Performatively Reading

I used to read a lot as a child, to the point that I would secretly get up and read in the moonlight because I really wanted to know what happened next. Mum wasn’t happy when she would inevitably catch me, after all I was still a growing child and falling asleep in class is just bad optics.

I would use the school library a lot and would always borrow the maximum amount allowable (usually 3 a week) because I couldn’t stop. I would read encyclopaedias, fantasy, drama, slice of life, biographies, poems; whatever I could grab and carry with my stubby little hands. Every free moment was spent reading, even while I was eating (I made sure to not get food onto the pages).

My parents were always running their business so taking me to the local library was something that never crossed our minds. Besides, they were convinced at the time that it costs money to get a library card and it was a cost that they couldn’t really spare on me. But that’s okay, as long as I had the school library I could just min-max my reading there during lunch time.

Once I got to high school, I found out that library cards are free so I signed up and basically borrowed as much as I could feasibly carry in my school bag. Again, just about anything and everything I could grab onto. That’s the thing about childhood; I only had to worry about homework and assignments, so I had a lot of time dedicated to reading. There were state reading challenges that I would easily complete (20 books in a month or something like that), that was so fun. I always made sure to grab books the moment it caught my interest, and made it a rule to finish reading them no matter if I enjoyed it or not. I always read ahead in assigned readings from English class and because I read ahead, I end up re-reading again and again just to pass time.

Then I got my first laptop and home internet connection when I turned fifteen, the online world was so captivating and addicting that going online (mostly reddit and YouTube) replaced reading. Slowly I stopped reading as much, instead having my ears covered up in headphones to watch videos and listen to music.

I stopped having patience.

Going a day without my mobile phone was excruciatingly hard.

So I’ve gone a very, very long time without reading a book. And now, I want to read again and rediscover my love for books. Which is why I finally went ahead and made this blog, it’s a way to keep myself accountable to the goals I set for myself every year:

Read at least 12 books a year.

But it’s September now, nine months into the year – how did it go? So far six books, and I have three more months left in the year to try and hit that magical twelve. Realistically with work and me going back to university, six books in three months is a very tall order; but I wasn’t raised to crumble so fast in the face of a challenge so let’s see how it goes!

This blog is set to not be easily discovered so if you find this, hi, hello! Thanks for dropping by!